Happy Friday, everyone!

When I was serving as pastor of Evangelism and Missions, I was called to respond to Hurricane Katrina. And I remember walking into the first flooded homes and beginning our work and quietly thinking, “Wow, these people are really messy. How do you let your house get like this?”

Because at the time, I didn’t understand. I saw the condition of the house, but I didn’t yet really understand the power of the storm.

Years later, Hurricane Harvey hit while I was living in Texas, and my home had 51 inches of water in it.

I still remember the first time I got back into my own house. There was mud, water damage, furniture was destroyed, and everything was out of place. It was an absolute mess.

But here’s what hit me. That’s not how I left it. You see, the mess wasn’t the full story. And suddenly I recalled my thoughts being in those homes in Katrina, and I began to think about them differently.

That experience taught me something important. Specific compassion for specific pain is often borne through personal experience. Sometimes God allows us to walk through something difficult. Not so we can say, I completely understand.

Because the truth is, we don’t.

Even if two people go through hurricanes, the losses are different. The fears are different. The memories are different. The grief will be different.

So we need to be careful with that phrase, “Oh, I understand what you’re going through.”

Usually, we don’t fully understand everything someone is carrying, but we can understand pieces.

We can recognize fear. We can recognize loss, exhaustion, confusion, disorientation. Because in many circumstances, we have suffered that too.

Our hearts often soften deeper towards others who are hurting. Once we ourselves know what that is about.

It’s two sides of the same coin. You can’t fully understand someone else’s pain, but personal pain can help create deeper compassion.

Paul writes to this in 2 Corinthians 1: “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.” (2 Corinthians 1:3-4)

Just notice what Paul doesn’t say. He doesn’t say, “You now fully understand everyone.”

He simply says you can comfort others with the comfort you received. That’s a little bit different.

We don’t empathize from a complete understanding.
We find compassion in shared humanity.
Shared weakness.
Shared need for grace.
And maybe that’s enough.

Maybe Friday is a good reminder for you to be careful judging the mess you see in someone else’s life as you go throughout your weekend.

You may not know what storm they’ve walked through. And if you’ve walked through storms of your own, well, you might actually take a moment to thank God for those.

Not because the storm was good, but because God can use even painful experiences to deepen your compassion for others. And that compassion is something that is so needed. And I pray you remember that as you go into your weekend.

Prayer
Lord, thank You for meeting us in our storms. Give us humble hearts that are slow to judge and quick to show compassion. Help us never assume that we fully understand another person’s pain, but teach us to walk gently beside those who are hurting. Use even our hardest experiences to make us more gracious, more patient, and more like Jesus. Jesus, thank You that You stepped into our pain and into our mess, and You bore it all at the cross. And You give to us new life, new hope, even amidst and through that pain. Be with us this weekend and we pray this in Jesus’s name. Amen.

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